Loving social media isn't always easy. Certain protocols, mostly 'learned' along the way, definite 'dos and do NOT's' that online society deems appropriate. You inevitably learn not to post something in all caps, or create too many posts in a given amount of time on Facebook.
When e-mail was introduced, there was a wide berth, but there also wasn't a lot of folks using it. If you are old enough to remember, the 'normal' office in the late 80's had a couple of computers. One, in particular, was the word processor's computer. The 'word processor' was a person who usually had a year or two of computer science education, and knew their way around a QWERTY. The novelty of sending a message from desk to desk was considered lazy and efficient.
Flash forward to MultiMate letters. Now, THERE was a word processing system. AOL was all the rage, and everyone wanted to hear 'You've got mail!' Let's not get into the awkward 'fashionable attire' of the time. Over time, 'others' were given the opportunity to 'dial up' to the world wide web.
We've come a long way baby. Tonight, after an evening with friends, I retired to my corner of the couch, pulled out the netbook, and started checking my e-mails (mostly junk mail). Went to my Facebook site, scrolled quickly through my feed, then answered a few notes that were direct messaged to me. I guess that my evening's conversations were not enough, as two of them appeared to be from the same people that I had just spent three hours with at the coffee shop. One was a reminder that I needed to show up for a 'girl's afternoon'. The other was a plea for a smart phone inadvertently left in the back seat of my vehicle. Simple comments, regards sent, smart phone delivered back at 1:30 AM to it's rightful owner.
Much of our conversations tend to be just that, simplistic conversations, interspersed with shared pictures of our weekend, generalized observations of life and the issues that we face. On occasion however, we are all 'guilty' of either venting our latest pet peeve or airing our grievances, politics, (fill in your favorite 'things you should not talk about at the bar') out on social sites. The magic of social media, coupled with our innate sense of our First Amendment rights, and the idea that others will rally behind our just causes. Sometimes, just once in a while, those messages are covert comments to a particular few. Undercutting, back-biting, nasty bits of ourselves that are dressed up as something less than.
It is just such a situation that has played out, more than just once, and not just my own experience. I have seen how adults play the role of insecure 13 year olds, taunting others, and ridiculing those they do not like or agree with. These venomous comments are interspersed between the family pictures, the 'friends night out' photo, and the ever popular memes of the day. I am not standing on a bully pulpit, claiming to have never taken part in the jousts and jabs. I have, over the years, become a much more savvy and sophisticated user of social media.
About a month or so ago, I posted a comment about how some adults act like children, and I'd rather deal with 9 and 10 year olds, they're more honest and upfront. I was making a commentary about a case that I was watching on television. Because EVERYONE knows what I am doing and thinking about when the post was made, the assumption was carried. Within a period of 2 hours, I received a number of direct messages. Guess I had ruffled a few feathers. More accurately, my message worried a lot of folks. They were trying to decipher exactly what THEY had done or said that would make me post something about THEM! Apparently, a few folks had not been on best behavior, nor had they lived up to the hype that they had posted on their site.
Thinking that things were taken care of and cleared up, I went to work the next day. After enough 'glares and stares', a few co-workers stopped me to ask how things were going. After dancing about the subject for a short time, one of them questioned the basis for my commentary online from the previous night, wanting to know who at work were the guilty party/parties. They seemed disappointed that there was no bits of juicy gossip to partake in. Even further yet, there was a bit of disbelief that I would be posting about something that didn't have anything to do with them or someone that they were aware of. It was a wake-up call. People were reading my posts and discerning what they wanted to read into it. Even when it had nothing to do with them, there was an example that came to their mind, something or someone that triggered a correlation.
Think about it, how amazing is that? You can post anything that you want on your blog, Twitter account, or Facebook page, and immediately, there is a line drawn between you and some other issue or person at hand. So many experts on social media have warned us about this. They've discussed how to 'clean up' your site, what you might want to avoid posting if you are on the job hunt, or further yet, what you should NEVER post if you work in any particular profession. There are social media specialists that are taking a handsome sum away from companies to tidy up loose ends. There are life coaches, marketing professionals, and public relations personnel working overtime to make certain that there is nothing out there that would be a detriment to the company employing them. Even the federal government monitors social media to make certain our greater good and security are not jeopardized.
So, what does this mean for all of the 'free spirits' who want to voice their ideas? Have you thought about what you're posting? Did you consider the comments that are made about your comment? Were you focused on those people that you weren't focusing on, making certain they caught your subtle sarcasm that wasn't even directed at them?
Enough questioning for now. Post at will.
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